Patron claims he’s working with the FBI, our employee is a webcam agent, and he wants a refund.

I can’t make this stuff up. As a disclaimer, this person was clearly mentally ill which is very sad considering there is nothing we can do to help him. But in the moment, this was an… insane call to deal with.

Guy calls because he wanted a refund for his camping trip. Normally the park has to approve any refunds but he already talked to them. They won’t give him a refund, so he’s calling me at the headquarters.

He told me that his sister’s ex is trying to kill him, and that the ex sent trained coyotes to kill him in his sleep. They came up to his tent during the night but luckily he’s working with the FBI and because they have secret cameras in the trees they sent their trained dogs to protect him.

He then went on about how a female park employee “Jennifer” was actually a web came agent having underage sex with other park guests and he saw it happen multiple times.

At this point I cut him off and put him on hold. I call the park and the manager knows EXACTLY who I’m talking about and reiterated that he will NOT be getting a refund.

I got back to the man and tell him sorry, but there’s nothing we can do for you. He doesn’t like this and goes off more about the female park employee and I cut him off again saying that we cannot do anything for him.

He then asked “What do you think about what I’m telling you?” I told him I could not comment on that. Then he demanded to speak to my manager (who is standing next to my desk at this point listening and shaking his head no) so I tell the man that my manager cannot do anything either since it’s the park that has to approve the refund. Finally I get the guy to hang up.

I talked to the park manager again who told me he ended up calling the guys mother (her name and payment was tied to the camping reservations so she would get the refund instead of him if they approved it). He couldn’t ask about disabilities but he told her what was going on and she said “Oh, sounds like he forgot to take his meds again”. He then asked “Should I be concerned for the safety of my staff?” and she said “Oh, I don’t think so….” -_-

Also the park manager told me I missed the part about the trained spiders. Guess I cut him off too soon.