You can do no wrong and this is all our fault, naturally

I take calls from both the customers who own our company’s products and the sales reps who sell them. The sales reps have access to a list of all their clients’ purchases online. The sales rep website is admittedly kind of shitty but it gets the job done. It doesn’t have a lot of problems except that it was obviously designed in 2008 and hasn’t really been updated since.

Sales rep starts off SCREAMING that there is a glitch in our website that caused him to not include a large purchase his client made in a report the sales rep prepared. The website isn’t known for problems but I don’t love the sales website so I am on his side initially. He’s demanding someone solve this problem and wants some kind of apology for making him look like an idiot in front of the client, because this mistake on the report is obviously all the company’s fault! He’s being a huge ass, but I’m optimistic we can reach a resolution.

I eventually convince him to walk through the process of looking up client accounts with me so that I can understand the problem, the whole time he’s complaining that he did this a million times and it didn’t show. We get to the page listing all this client’s purchases. Right away I know what the problem is, but he’s right back to being mad when we get to this screen.

“See, I told you it’s not there! I am potentially missing out on future business with this client because this wasn’t in my report, but this is YOUR fault! The level of service I’m being provided is unacceptable!”

“Sir, do you see the green arrow at the top of the page that says ‘next page?’”

Silence for a good five seconds before he says, quiet and indignant while my heart is fucking SOARING in joy, “oh. Well. There’s so much damn blank space on this useless website I didn’t even see it.”

Uh huh. “I apologize it was not immediately visible. I’m relieved the website is working properly on your end. Is there anything else I can do today sir?”


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