So this is from my time working at a call center as a CSR for an online pet supplies company. As I said in my last post, most of the customers were elderly and obsessed with their 15 cats and/or chihuahuas.
But this customer… I’ve been waiting to tell someone who will appreciate the extreme suffering I went through on this call for so long. For reference, most calls were expected to last between 5-7 minutes, this one lasted almost an hour. We were also not allowed to hang up no matter what. In parentheses are my comments.
Me: Thanks for calling x, this is ogpuffyjones. How may I help you today?
C: (in a very strong southern accent) Do you have organic cat food?
Me: We have several different brands of cat food. I’m sure we can find one for your furbaby. Do you already have an account with us?
C: No and I don’t want one. I just want to place an order. (they usually need an account to order, but there’s ways to get around it and place it under a guest account so I let it go.)
Me: Absolutely, so did you have any specific brands in mind?
C: Which brands do you have?
Me: lists off like 10 brands Do any of those sound familiar?
C: Well are they organic? Can you list off the ingredients?
Me: Sure, on which one?
C: All of them.
Me: (at this point I knew I was in for a fucking treat) Um okay.. lists off ingredients on one of them Does that sound good?
C: Yeah… but is it organic?
Me: It says it’s organic.
C: Read me the ingredients on another brand.
Me: Okay does the same thing again How about this one?
C: That seems pretty good and all… but is it organic?
Me: It says it’s organic on this one too. Sir, when you say “organic” what exactly do you mean?
C: Aren’t you supposed to know that?! YOU WORK FOR A CAT FOOD COMPANY!! (a. no, I work for a pet supplies retailer, and b. maybe I should know, but we’re given almost no training on the products we’re selling. my job is to help you place orders and login to your account and shit like that, not give you advice on your animal’s food)
Me: Okay… well the ones we’ve gone over specifically stated that they were organic.
C: Read me another one, then.
This whole process goes on for quite a while until he asks that I search on other pet supplies websites. We’re actually encouraged to do that if we can’t find something that meets the customer’s needs, so as sick of him as I was, I had to do it.
Same process here. Reading every last god damn ingredient and him asking if it’s organic. Eventually, after all this time, the customer ends the conversation with this:
“You know what, I think I’ll just go to PetSmart instead.”
I almost fainted out of a mixture of frustration and heavenly relief.
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