in

I want a paper bill

Me: usually greeting

Sir: i want to know why i have a bill when i paid £700 recently

Me: look at the account. He had paid a £700 bill after a new bill was produced which meant his actuall balance was £900 and because of the £700 payment he now owed £200. £10 is a late payment fee

Sir: i didnt know that i had these bills you guys never send me any bills

Me: sir i can see you have an online account we will have put your bills on there then notified you by email. What we can do if you cant afford the £200 is place you on a payment arrangment

Sir: well i never signed up for an online account you guys did it because you always asked me for my email

Me: sir we wouldnt put you on an online account you have to do that

Sir: but i didnt you did it

Me: not possible sir, we would have sent an authorisation code to your email which you would have to put on to your online account to acitvate it. We dont have access to your email

Sir: then my daughter set it up. Not my fault

Me: ive deleted your online account and removed your email address off of your account. Ive also sent you a paper bill. We still need to discuss the £200

Sir: its £190

Me: no sir its £200

Sir: im not paying the £10 late fee because its not my fault i didnt get a bill

Me: sir you did get a bill, it was just online. Im not removing the £10 late fee

Sir: well f*** you then

Me: disconnect – note up his abusive language

DontGetPaidEnough

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Little Old Lady 2.0

Today is the first day I got a client swearing at me.