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Bye Felicia!

Many years ago, I used to work for a company that sold/out sourced customer service. We had multiple clients at any given time, the client I was currently working for was a big match making service that was all about harmony.

Before I begin, sorry for formatting, on mobile

This company… well not the customer service company but the matchmaking company, had some shady ass policies. All their fine print stuff on their billing page was literally fine print like maybe .5 size font, and it caused a lot of problems because they would have these $20/month deals for 3 months but they would bill you $60 up front for all three months. Lot of angry lonely people calling in. Also shady and key to this story was they had a 3 day refund policy.

The saving grace of the company was if the customer swore at you, you could bid them farewell and hang up on them. Most people usually have a warning to be courteous, but I digress.

This tale has an Irate Customer known as IC and I will be Me

Me: Thank you for calling matchmaking company customer service this is Inapsine, how can I help you?

IC: You need to refund me my money because I wanted the $20/month special and I was billed $60

Boring account details exchanged

Me: Okay it looks like you purchased the special a few weeks ago, let me see what I can do to assist you.

At this point I was combing through the various retention offers the company offers. The way the company kept people on their service was to overcharge for a basic month to month subscription but offer crazy deals for extended periods of time with automatic renewal. One of the offers available to this particular customer was 3 free months on top of what they had already paid.

Me: Okay IC, due to the refund policy I can’t refund you the $60, however..

IC: WHAT?! YOU GIVE ME MY REFUND RIGHT NOW YOU BASTARD.

Me: IC I understand you’re frustrated and I am trying to help you, but if you curse at me again I will hang up on you.

IC: YEAH RIGHT YOU BITCH ID LIKE TO SEE YOUT TRY

Me: Sir I warned you I’d hang up on you if you swore at me again, thank you for calling matchmaking company. click

Kinda anti climatic, but it still felt so damn good.

submitted by /u/lnapsine
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