x-post from /r/talesfromretail Customer service bingo

A lot of customers show a few of these traits, but some seem to have them all-

The belief that they are the only truly important customer, and you should see to them first

Asking for ‘corporate’ as a first move

Describing anything that displeases them as ‘unacceptable’

They have a true and deep knowledge of customer service, which often dovetails exactly with their own desires at that moment

Chuckling derisively at the low wages of lowly droids while themselves being retired/unemployed/married to an idiot with more money than sense

Closely connected is ‘I pay your wages, you work for me’

The idea that there’s some secret extra supply of goods or services that can be accessed if you wheedle/cry/threaten in the right combination.

Asking your name repeatedly as an intimidation tactic and then…

Using your name repeatedly, often demanding a surname. (If pressed I give a family surname ‘Featherstonehaugh’ which is irrationally pronounced ‘Festonhew’. Good luck with that one)

Deliberate stupidity. You’ve broken it down to ‘Harold the Bunny needed some lights in his house, so he signed something called a contract’ level but they obstinately refuse to understand. Some people are really dim, but I’ve had doctors try it on

There must be loads I’ve missed, so please feel free to add…

submitted by /u/mronion82
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