Seagulls’ PPE

Another tale from my call center experience in the shipping company. I won’t go much into detail, but if you’d like to know more, you could have a read here or here. This time it wasn’t directly a call center concern. It was an eMail by a worried customer to a colleague – don’t know in which department anymore – and he forwarded it (and his reply) to other departments and to us.

Customer: “Dear…, we went on a tour with the catamaran last weekend and we had a nice ride with a light swell and we are pretty much regained now. The only thing we were wondering about were the seagulls sitting on the surface of the water we rode towards. We never saw them flying away. What happens to them? I hope they didn’t die!”

Colleague: “Dear…, we are glad to hear, that you had a relaxed holiday and we will try to help clarifying what happens to the seagulls.

What you maybe didn’t notice was, that all seagulls on the open sea wear a PPE, a personal protection equipment, made of tiny helmets and life vests. So if we hit them with one of the two hulls they’ll be fine und just get back up to the surface.

(I really loved that passage, because I imagined how stupid seagulls might look with that “PPE” and how they would turn back up like a roly-poly doll. But he didn’t stop here.)

“No, just kidding and we hope you don’t take it amiss. Now to the real explanation: Due to the two hulls and the general higher position of the catamaran there will be no harm to seagulls, as they pass the hole. They maybe get wet or shaken a bit, but usually nothing more. And if they’re about to get hit by one of the hulls the natural flight instinct kicks in and the seagulls fly away to the sides on a height were you won’t see them.

We hope we were able to clear things up for you and hope to see you again.”

TL;DR: Colleague made fun of a worried customer by creating a funny fictional fact, but clears things up in the end.

submitted by /u/starfoolGER
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Screw that place, walked out in style.