Simple stupidity

So I don’t have the most exciting story ever told on this sub, but it could be one of the dumbest.

I work for a 401k recordkeeper. People treat their retirement plans like a bank as it is, but most employers only allow you to have full access to the entire balance for withdrawal once you’re age 59 1/2.

Me: [geeting] Guy: Yeah I’d like to do a withdrawal, I’m 59 1/2 Me: [checks DOB & today’s date (5/8)] Ok sir, I’m seeing that you were born on December 8th, is that right? Guy: uh, yes, obviously Me: (already annoyed at this point) And today is May 8th. Is that right? Guy: are you stupid? Look at the calendar Me: So according to my math, that means you would be 59 and 5 months today. You will not be 59 and 6 months until June. Guy: well that’s just not right. I don’t understand. I need to withdraw 80,000 today. I already made arrangements for this money. Make it happen Me: Sir, you will have full access to the account in 1 month, but not until then Guy: I just don’t get it. HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?! Your partner [someone I work with I guess] told me YESTERDAY that I could do this withdrawal today!!! I just don’t get it Me: ok let’s do the math- January would be one month, feb would be two [so on and so forth] and that makes June 8 the six month point Guy: THAT DOESN’T even make sense!!! Its been 6 months!!! Im 59 1/2 AND I NEED THAT MONEY TODAY! Give me your manager Me: ok, I can bring on a supervisor, but they will tell you the same. May is 5 months from December. That will not change. Guy: I DONT FUCKING CARE I ALREADY MADE PLANS FOR THAT MONEY

[i escalate to a manager at this point]

Again, not the most thrilling, but I was sitting scratching my head over that one for a while. Trying to explain basic math to someone who’s 59 was harder than I thought.

Edit: spelling