I deal with insane people on a regular basis at a performing arts school. This is the story of one of the most obnoxious people I’ve dealt with.
Dad will be A, I will be R
A: I am calling to complain about the services provided
R: I am sorry to hear that you are unhappy with the program, please let me know what the issue is so I can help resolve it.
A: My daughter didn’t learn anything
R: I am sorry to hear that, can you please explain
A: They just have her practicing a script and she’s not learning anything
R: I am very sorry to hear that but our curriculum does include memorizing a script and working on performance techniques
A: Oh wow. You are very well trained, good job.
R: I’m sorry, I am trying to explain why she is working on that assignment
A: Is this how you handle all calls? Wow, good job. They have you so well-trained
R: I don’t understand what the problem is, I am simply trying to find a resolution for your concern
A: Uh-huh. You are trained like a dog, are you not allowed to speak for yourself?
R: so confused and irritated If you’d like, we can give her a different script or we can have her start the program over so she can have more time to prepare the performance
A: Wow are you reading off a script? Good job. Company Name must be so proud of how well you’re trained
R: Sir, I am trying to resolve your concern. Is there anything specific you’d like us to do for you.
A: I want real answers, not this script you’re reading
(side note: I don’t use a script)
R: Let me put you on a quick hold so I can have my manager review your account
I put him on hold, my manager advises me to waive the remaining balance on the account
R: Hello, thank you for holding. Management has given me approval to waive your remaining balance
A: Sure they did, you are doing such a good job.
R: I am trying to resolve your issue, I am sorry that you are unhappy with our program and with my attempt to resolve it
A: Sure you are. I don’t want anything to do with your company, you’re a scam.