Really?????

I used to work for a well-know bank. This happened on my brithday last year, FML.

Me: Yours truly TC: The caller

Me: Thank you for calling (Bank’s Name). This is Pablizza93, May I have your first and last name please.

TC: Hi, my name is TC. Good Morning!

Me: Good Morning miss TC! How may I help you?

TC: I want to update the address on my account.

(I took the credit card number and her ssn)I noticed that she is the Authorize User, not the Primary Card Holder. The primary is a man with her same last name. Both of them are in their 20’s.

As an authorize user, I can use her ssn to access the account, and I can give her any info that she needs, but she CAN’T make changes.

Me: I will be happy to assist you miss, but in order to update the address I need to speak with the primary card holder.

TC: He is my brother and I`m on this account. Can I do it?

Me: I’m sorry miss, but it only can be done by the primary. Is he there with you?

TC: Yes, he is.

Me: May I speak with him?

TC: mmm no, that’ll be awkward.

Me: Well miss, in order to update the address I need to speak with him, if he is not available, you are more than welcome to call us back later.

TC: He is here, but he cannot talk with you. I’m masturbating him right now.

My brain crashed like window vista.

The first thing that came into my mind is “Why did you thought this was the best time to call the bank?” and a couple of seconds later I remembered she mentioned he was her brother.

Me, after some silence: Well miss, in that case he is more than welcome to call us back later. Have a nice day