So normally Halloween is a really slow night for an insurance call center, but for some reason we were slammed. And this caller’s thought process was easily part of the scariest part of the night
He was in a lapse of coverage and wanted to start a policy immediately because he was pulled over on the side of the road and the cop basically told him if he can get insured right away, it’ll just be a warning, not a fat ticket and his car impounded. I’m some states, cops have the flexibility to let you off the hook that way.
So I put together the policy and given the guy’s record, it was pretty damn pricey, like $300/mo for liability only. But that’s what happens when you collect tickets like 90s kids collected beanie babies. But at the end, it turns out he has no money to pay it. Shocker. So he’s begging me to start him with no payment (which I can’t do), and I’m trying to be helpful suggesting we call family or friends, when he hands me this one. I’ll be PNP, he’ll be C:
C: “Why don’t you pay for me? I don’t have any money.”
PNP: “I’m really sorry man, I really can’t. I could lose my license doing that and even so, I don’t have that kind of money on me.”
Then all hell breaks loose with this guy.
C: “You’re a salesperson right? Then do your job and sell me this insurance! Use your commission or something!! I don’t give a f***, but you have to pay for this for me!! I can’t get my car impounded again. Pay it for me!”
PNP: -a few seconds of stunned silence to process this idiocy- “Sir, I don’t think you know how commission works. First I don’t get a commission, second, if I did, buying your insurance would be a lot more than any commission I’d make, and third, it’s not my job to buy your insurance for you.”
At this point, I can hear some muffled words and then the police officer in the background ask the guy if he has insurance yet.
C: “No, I have no money and this sales guy won’t pay for it for me.
At this point, the cop says what I wish I could have said.
“You want him to pay for it?? Do you do this at the grocery store? Fill up your cart with food and demand the checker pay for it? Get out the car, I’m calling the tow truck.”