They call her "Mrs. Pituitary Gland"

I work at a call center selling clothes for older women. Usually the calls go relatively fast – place order, payment info and on to the next. Until this woman called.

I thank her for calling and ask how I can help her. She says, “Well first I’d like to fill you in with a little bit of backstory before I place my order. I’m like, okay sure. Not knowing what she was about to unload on me.

She goes on to tell me that her husband has been taking medicine due to and overactive pituitary gland, and that this medicine has been making him grow very large F cup breasts. She told me his measurements and says, “As you can see he has a quite lovely hourglass shape any woman would die for.” She says that since his new shape is so undeniably feminine they (her, the doctor and her husband) have begone the process of transforming him into a woman.

She told me that her best friend owns a high end lingeree boutique and offered him a job, but the dresscode is skirts and dresses. She gave me a few examples of the clothes she had in mind, and the types of clothes she likes to dress him in. She said that he was in the next room so he couldn’t hear anything. I tell her I’m happy to help her and it seemed like a fun project. But I first wanted to ask her.. is he ok with transistioning or is he bitter about suddenly growing massive boobs and losing his masculinity? Just trying to gauge were he was at mentally before I spoke with him.

She goes into a whole speil about how he’s shy. He’s 31 and she 41. She talks about how every 2 weeks they get his haircut slightly more feminine. She once took him out to eat and put him in stilettos and how “He didn’t even realize he was getting stares from men”. And about the lavish work galas she has to go to and how she wants him to start going with her again.

Then, right when I was about to speak with him to place the order, the phone discounnects. My mouth drops. At first I thought, Oh my God, she’s gonna have to call back and retell that whole thing to someone else when she places her order again. I told my coworker about it and she immeditaly said “Oh my Gosh,that’s so crazy. That lady was playing you.”

The thing about this woman is that she was SO SINCERE. She had so many specific details and stories. Some of which didn’t seem that outlandish because I talk to a lot of rich old ladies. I’m happy to help anyone. And I love gay people. It was just so bizarre.

A couple days later, I was talking to my boss and I decided to tell her about the caller. As soon as I opened my mouth she said, “Ohh her, yep. She’s been calling for years. We call her Mrs. Pituitary gland.” She traced the call and saw that she’s been calling our call center with this same story since 2014.

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