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Lady explains her positive drug test to me on the phone

I used to work in recruiting at a higher education institution, which at one point was basically like a call center. I was tasked with calling a ridiculous number of students who hadn’t returned to take classes, ask them why they haven’t returned, and beg them to give us their money in the form of coming back.

The most interesting call I ever made was to a lady who chewed me out because we apparently wouldn’t let her into our nursing program…

Lady: You wouldn’t let me in because I failed a drug test. But I can explain why.

Me:…..

Lady: I failed it because I’d had sex with my boyfriend the night before. He does drugs and he came inside of me. I don’t do drugs.

What made this even better is the fact that my boss required us to take detailed notes of our conversations with students. You can bet your ass I typed our conversation in verbatim.

submitted by /u/letmebe03
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Yeah, let me just go hang myself.

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