On mobile, so please excuse any crazy formatting.
I used to work in a call center doing technical support for certain electronic devices. Most of our products came with a security measure that must be disabled before the device could be repaired.
This feature could be disabled in a couple of ways, but if the device was broken or you for some reason could not access the security feature directly through the device you had to do it online.
Most people either called us for instructions or googled, but independent repair shops or tech stores could also help.
Now, to disable this measure you had to log into your account, where you were shown two options: disable, or delete. To remove the measure you had to chose disable, since delete would only remove the device from your account list temporarily (until you connected to WiFi, which could be pretty much as soon as you reloaded the page).
It’s worth noting that we could NOT do this for the customers on our end, since it required sign-in and we never, ever had access to customer passwords.
So with that out of the way, let’s get to the story!
This smug dickhead called from a third party tech support store while helping a customer send their device off for repair.
ME will be me, and SD will be smug dickhead:
ME: “Thank you for calling, how can I help?”
SD: (On speaker) “I’m trying to help this customer remove the security feature from their device online, but your website isn’t working. You’ll have to do it on your end.”
ME: “I’m sorry about that. I’m afraid I can’t do it from my end, but I’m happy to walk you through it.”
SD: “Look, I do this multiple times a day. It’s not working. Do it from your end.”
ME: “I can’t do it from my end, sir. Let’s just go through it together and if it doesn’t work I’ll figure something out.”
SD: “Urgh, fine!”
I start guiding them to log in and navigate the website. SD keeps making exasperated notices and smug comments after each step, and keeps telling me to just disable it from my end. Keep in mind that the customer is still listening to this since we’re om speaker.
ME: “Okay, can you see the device there, and your options? It should say ‘disable’ and ‘delete’.”
SD: “(Sigh) Yes! I’ll press ‘delete’ and it won’t work, and this will all be a waste of time.”
ME: “(Doing a two-handed fuck-you dance in my chair to the screen) No, you should be pressing ‘disable’. Try that.” I probably sounded smugger than strictly polite.
SD: “… okay-that-worked-thanks-bye!” Hangs up
Because god forbid that I know our own product, right? But DAMN it felt good to practically tell that guy to go fuck himself.