I guess I’ll just have to contact a lawyer. IS THAT WHAT I’M GOING TO HAVE TO DO!?

I work for a large insurance company, providing customer service to an array of customers. I was speaking with a client last week who was absolutely coming apart at the seams over a clause to his policy. A clause that neither he nor I can change. He said at first that he would contact his employer, and I told him he could do that if he chose to (it’s their damn policy, anyway!). He then said, “I guess I’ll just have to contact a lawyer. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO!? IS THAT WHAT I’M GOING TO HAVE TO DO!?” I’ve been working in a customer service environment for 12 years now. I do not care about your idle threats. I told him that it was up to him if he chose to retain an attorney. Literally no front line employees care if, in the midst of an unwarranted temper tantrum, you threaten to retain an attorney. NOBODY CARES.

Larry McLiarPants, noticeably stunned by how non-responsive I was to his meltdown, chose to disconnect the call, thereby saving me the task of pretending to care about his problem, and saving him a further diatribe of how much he hates his insurance company. Have fun contacting your make believe attorney to take on your dead before it’s drafted lawsuit!