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Content warning: this post is about people having loud sex and descriptive sex while on the phone with an unwilling me
On my very first day of call center work I received a call from some dude who was contacting us on behalf of his partner. Said partner was, shall we say, definitely present during the call.
Now I’m no prude, I’ve been around the block a few times, I know what it sounds like when people are having sex while on the phone with me. I was very very prepared to ignore that aspect of the call and hit all my talking points. Maybe they’re very busy people and can’t stop boning to do something as silly as check if a deposit has been made in their unemployment account.
I become less convinced that this is an accident when the woman starts saying “You sure she hears you?” and he responded “Yeah but she don’t even know I’m balls deep in this pussy right now” (spoiler alert: that alerted me to the fact that he was likely balls deep in her pussy right then).
As it was my first day I was too scared to try to drop the call, so I completed the task of informing them their account balance and the fact that their unemployment payments had not come in.
“Thank you for calling Bank of COUNTRY”
“Thank YOU. You got a sexy voice-“
I ended the call and went into chat with my supervisor to ask if I’m allowed to drop a call if people are “making lewd comments”. Of course the answer is no, I just notate it.
Anyway I’m sorry/you’re welcome for this tale, and for the love of whoever please leave innocent people who are just trying to do their jobs out of your kink shit
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