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“I can’t pay back these loans because PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO KILL ME”

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I got this one. Lady from Arkansas, strong Ozark accent. That was her opening line. She then goes on to say:

I have the police reports. Someone is messing with my gas lines, causing me to have a gas leak. I crashed my truck last week because the gas. And then I got fired from my job because people are spreading lies about me. I’m a home care nurse and people are saying I’m stealing medication, I’m prostituting myself to the elderly. My boss called me into his office and let me know. I couldn’t even defend myself because my head was still in a mix because of the gas leak, and all that came out my mouth was gibberish. So he fired me and I ain’t got a vehicle. And I got someone trying to cause a gas leak, so I’m just calling to let you all know that I can’t make any payments right now.

Ok, lady I didn’t need to know any of that. We have covid relief for people who lost their job, so here’s 12 months of no payments. Bye 👋🏻

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