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I had a collections call today for a woman who had £480 outstanding on her bill and a vaguely familiar name.
She came through sounding in pain and said she was in active labour and needed her intermet and phone being reactivated as she has an autistic child at home, so I made the appropriate sympathetic noises and said I’d see about getting her services restored.
I should have checked the notes as something about her name was bugging me, but honestly I’ve had a crap start to the year and gave her the benefit of the doubt. We’ve all been there, right?
I told her time frames and all that jazz, then checked the notes.
Guys. I talked to her in September where she said she needed to set up a payment plan because she had just given birth “yesterday”. This woman had called in August too, saying the same thing… and in June. That’s 4 alleged pregnancies in 7 months!
She’s either a walking miracle and needs studied, bullsh*tting, or part cat.
The worst bit is that she knew I knew she was full of it on the last call so changed it up to get us to let her get away without paying her bills again. I damned sure left deeply detailed notes for the next adviser and let my manager know I made a mistake so she can flag it with our offline collections teams.
Please tell me your most ridiculous calls or situations like this!
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