So today was have fun at work day and I got the bright idea to try and come up with a 10 commandments for call centers. I thought that sharing the commandments that my coworkers and I came up with might give someone a much needed laugh.
1. Thou shall never ever discuss Call Volume. Doing so invites the attention of the telephone gods and they will make your day immeasurably worse.
2. Thou shall not call with static on the line and screaming child and barking dog from a noisy car
3. Thou shall not call while in the restroom and flush the toilet while on the call.
4. Thou shall put in thy dentures before making the call
5. Thou shall swallow all food and beverages before calling
6. Thou shall not get upset when information is repeated back to you. The QA gods are listening.
7. Thou shall not cough or blow your nose in our ears
8. Thou shall check the office hours before calling.
9. Thou shall not curse us out because you can not have your way.
10. Agents shall always and in perpetuity have the power and privilege to mock you after the call has been disconnected.
11. Thou shall not call and talk all low and thinking it’s sexy.
12. Thou shall not get mad at us for asking you to repeat information if you develop diarrhea of the mouth and start spewing information that we are not able to take yet.
Edit: Wow. Thank you for the award! It has been so much fun to see all of the additional commandments. Thank you very much for the laughs. 😆