Heya! this story comes from my first job at at a very known cable company that charges WAAAY too much for their services but whatever. This started out as a simple account review call, asking fees, payment due dates and such, the customer was actually really nice! Just thought this call was pretty hilarious.
***Skip all the confirmation procedures and info***
**Me**: Alright! How can I help you today sir?
C: Yes, so. I called to know which days I´m supposed to make my payments
I wasn´t exactly from the billing department, but my system still allowed me to see payment dates, charges and such so I decided to help instead of transferring him
**Me**: I can definetly can help with that! just a heads up, since I´m not from the billing department I can´t exactly take any payments.
**C**: That´s ok, I just wanted to know the date and the amount that´s due.
***Checking the info, and was honestly really surprised with his account, it was very much close to perfect, no past due payments, no extra charges, no weird charges for movies and even had a very cheap bill despite his cable package!***
**Me**: Ok! Well the amount due is: $38. 45 and your last day to make your payment would be on the 24th, two weeks from now, is there anything else I could help you with?
**C**: Oh yes! I have another account, well I pay for it, but my brother uses it. Could you check the same info?
**Me**: Sure thing! Could you give me the account number?
*Proceeds to get info, into account and finally… bill statements*
**Me**: (…) Right, sir, so… I´m just checking the bill statements and…
**Me**: Well, the bill´s due date is on the 29th and the ammount due is… um… $678.89
**Me**: The bill is $678.89
**C**: How in the sweet hell is the bill that high?
**Me**: Let me check that real quick for you sir
***Reading through bill charges***
**Me**: Uh, sir. does your brother has kids by any chance?
**C**: Yes, how do you know that?
**Me**: So from what I can read here, many of the charges were made due to renting and buying childrens movies (Some of them were adults ones)
**C**: Well, um. How many movies did they rent?
**Me**: *Counting* Around 58 movies, and 24 more were bought (some were the same, so the kids bought AND rented the same movie)
**C**: Oh my god! He´s SUCH A DEAD MAN
Me: I´m sorry for that, is there anything I could do to help?
**C**: Yes! Oh wow, I´m so sorry I´m not mad at you or anything, I´m just really pissed off right now, um. Could you read me every movie title, every amount and the date they were charged?
**Me**: Sure thing sir…
**Here´s a fun fact:** this call happened during a night shift, meaning that there were about 10 agents on floor that day, so I didn´t have the nice ambient noice of 90 agents talking at the same time to deafen out my voice, so all my coworkers were hearing me saying out loud every movie title, charge and date while making small calculations of all the charges and looking at me with grief and horror.
After a good 15 minutes of him writing down everything his voice tone changed into a more serious matter.
**Me**: That should be all of them, is there anything else I could help you with?
**C**: No, that should be it, you were really helpful, thank you so much
**Me**: If you need to, I can send to your phone instructions on how to put a PIN code so no more movies or shows can be added without consent
**C**: No that´s alright, it won´t be necessary
Me: Alright, be sure to remember your bill due dates, otherwise the account could be cancelled
**C**: OH believe me. He **WILL PAY**
***Customer hangs up***
**Me**: I don´t think he was talking about paying the bill…