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Getting snippy

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I work on a Covid helpline. Every now and then we get calls from you know whos.

I’ve learned to determine between those who are calling because they are on the fence, and those who are firmly on the other side of the fence. Today’s call was one of them.

Caller: Is the Pfizer vaccine going to be mandated to children over 5?
Me: An announcement on that matter isn’t expected until January 10.
Caller: Will that mean my kids couldn’t go to school if they aren’t given the poison?
Me: (Sigh internally) Maybe, if the department of education…
Caller: Then I’ll pull my kids out of school.
Me: Ok
Caller: You understand? I’ll pull my kids out of school.
Me: I understand.
Caller: Doesn’t the government care if kids don’t go to school?
Me: I’m sure they do. But you’ve called the Covid helpline, not the Department of Education.
Caller: You think you’re so clever. Do you know who Nikolai Petrovsky is?
Me: No. (Googling)
Caller: He’s a scientist who has proved Pfizer is poison.
Me: No, he’s a scientist who is a researcher into the Covax-19 vaccine. The Therapeutic Goods Association is currently evaluating Covax-19 to see if it is effective in the treatment of Covid-19.

Caller: And what about research into the compound MK-933. I bet you haven’t been told about that, have you.

Me: No, I haven’t (Googling)

Caller: It’s an antiviral drug that Japan has used to bring it’s covid cases down to zero. And you don’t even know about it.

Me: Actually, I know it’s Ivermectin. It’s used to treat parasitic infection.

Caller: It’s also an antiviral drug.

Me: Not according to the manufacturers. MERCK (I said “Merk”) is the company that makes Ivermectin. Their scientists don’t think it’s a usable Covid medication.

Caller: So how come Japan has brought it’ss covid infection rate to zero using Ivermectin?

Me: I don’t know. (Snippy times 1000) Have you tried asking the Japanese Coronavirus Helpline?
Caller: (chuckles) I’m going to sue all of you.
Me: Thank you for calling

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