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You’re LiTeRaLlY money laundering

So I used to work at a call centre, where a big part of my job was managing warranty claims on faulty handsets. A customer called in, having made a complaint before, and having been given a resolution for a refund of £1.7k (USD $2.3k) to his account. Not too shabby.

Only it had been 10 days – our timescale – and still, no refund.

I couldn’t see any reason why there had been a delay, so went to speak to a manager who could check how the payment was coming along. It turned out someone had just made a dumb error, and the payment hadn’t gone through. Easily fixed, thankfully.

We made payments by submitting a VERY tightly secured form. I explained this, and seeing he had some data concerns from the notes on his account, assured him his data was very safe.

I apologised to the customer and advised him that as management was aware of this and closely keeping an eye on it, he should get his big juicy payment around the middle of next week. I apologised profusely for the delay; it wasn’t his fault at all, of course. He seemed to be agreeable, and just as I was about to wind the call down–

Customer: “Wait. Do you not need my card details?”

Me: “No, my colleague who took your last call submitted everything using your bank account details, and we’ve double checked it’s all there. You don’t need to do anything else at all to get the refund.”

C: “But then how do I know my payment is coming?”

M: “I’m sorry for the delay. It should be with you by Wednesday next week at the latest.”

C: “But you don’t have my card details.”

M: “My colleague on your last call took all the details we need to get that refund sorted – just your bank account details, for a bank transfer.”

C: “Well then that’s money laundering, isn’t it?”

M: “…Um… no, we do not need card details to make a bank transfer.”

C: “But I paid for my phone by card. You’re using one way to take money and another”

M: “The refund is being paid by bank transfer – it is not money laundering, just a means of refunding you for the £1.7k agreed on your last call.”

C: “But that’s money laundering.”

​

It took about 10 minutes to communicate what a bank transfer is.

This man has children. And I’ve never seen someone so loath to get a free £1.7k.

What do you think?

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Just need to vent about calls