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So I work for a major UK retailer as a deputy senior complaints manager. This means I get allll the crazy customers, I have many stories and continue to get more insane ones which I will probably start posting more.
My go to explanation of my customers is the following call (this is paraphrasing from the best of my memory)
A customer had decided to buy, about 18 months prior, to buy a matching (very expensive) kettle and toaster set, as they had redesigned their kitchen and got these colourful appliances to match. Unfortunately one of their products broke down and we no longer sold that item in the same colour.
Me:”I’m really sorry Mrs customer, but we don’t sell these any more as the manufacturer discontinued them”
Cm:”I don’t care that its been discontinued, I want the same colour”
Me:”noone else does this colour or design”
Cm:”well then how about you exchange both for another colour and redesign my kitchen to match”
Me:”no we won’t be doing that”
Cm:”I want to talk to your manager”
Me:”no you can’t do that”(luxury of my position)
Cm:”well *retailer* has just lost a customer then”
*hangs up*
This is just my go to story, as I said above, will probably be posting more.
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