So, I posted my first story about Mary last night. I know it isn’t long since I last posted, but I wanted to share another tale about the sweet and crazy old lady.
If you haven’t read the other one, I worked in the call center of a small, local, bank and Mary was one of my regular customers. She was an elderly, widowed, woman who would only speak to me when she called.
Now, one day I received a pretty standard call from Mary. She wanted to check her bank balance, see if her great-grandson had cashed the $15 birthday check she had sent him, and just chat for a bit. It was a slow day and Mary was a wonderful person, so I didn’t mind just chatting for a few minutes. I had no other calls waiting and, thankfully, my boss was cool with us giving a personal touch to calls if it kept long-time customers happy.
I finished the normal bank-related part of the call when Mary hit me with this:
Mary: Did I ever tell you, Onyx, that my sister was also my sister-in-law?
Me: No, Mary, I don’t think you ever did. How did that happen?
Mary: Well, you see, I married ‘George’ and then, a few years later, my younger sister married George’s younger brother! So, she was my sister and my sister-in-law. Isn’t that wonderful?
Me: That’s great, Mary! I’ll bet you two had a lot of fun with that.
Mary: Oh, we did! In fact, their first date was a double-date with me and George when we were still engaged.
Me: That had to be a good time.
Mary: It was. Went to the drive-in movies. I used to love drive-ins. But, you know what? While me and George sat in the front, ‘Ted’ and my sister…the little hussy…were getting it on in the backseat!
Me: Oh…oh my. That had to be awkward.
Mary: It was! I told George ‘if you think I’m going to do that with you, then you have it all wrong. I’m going to be a virgin when we get married, God dammit!’
Me: laughs
Mary: You know what my sister told me? She told me that Ted gave it to her up the butt! Can you imagine?!
Me: laughing very hard Oh no!
Mary: I know! She was always a little floozy. I tried it in the butt once, didn’t like it. Well, I have to go now. You take care, Onyx.
With that pronouncement, Mary hung up. I think about this woman a lot. In my years working retail and banking, I never had a customer quite like her.
submitted by /u/Onyx_Owl
[link] [comments]
